It's gonna be worth it ALL!

Dream this morning:

I went down to another room, the room is having a banquet. It's like a high school graduation, I'm sitting with my mom. In the middle of the room are tables set up with food and gifts. People from church are in the room. The speaker speaks well about each person. And the speakers speaks really well about me. And he starts out names to give checks (scholarships). I'm sitting there thinking I don't deserve any of this, and probably won't get it. But the speaker calls my name, and I receive a huge check, it's like a ten thousand dollar check. And the memo says lunch. I'm surprised and said to mom, I don't deserve this! There are other people who need this money more than us! But mom, nodded her hair and took the check. She looked like she thinks I deserve it. And it goes on, maybe 3 or more times the speaker calls my name and hands me a check, the number keeps on getting bigger, not by a little but by a lot. It's increasing by the digits. I'm kind of angry, because I really think I don't deserve any of this.

Then someone at the end asked me if I'm willing to perform a song, I didn't answer. And the person says do you write any songs? I reply, yea, I can perform them. And so they tell me go to the theater to get ready to perform. I get there, the theater is packed with people, most of them are performer like myself. So ask the speaker of the house what's the schedule and where's my seat. He shows me the list, and I'm the last person to perform, and my seat is located in the very back. Which means I have to wait for 8 to 10 hours for to watch every performance of my school, and by the time it gets to me, everyone are are left. But I obey and sit in the very back the last seat in the corner.

I'm sitting there and I realize there's a portrait on the wall next to me. And it's Jesus!! The portrait is like oil painting, yet it moves as you gaze upon it, and it becomes 3D, it's like you can go in and see the experience. So I'm so excited, because I never thought it's possible in high school theater to have Jesus portrait. And I remembers that this is the year of Jesus(it make sense in the dream). As I'm gazing, I see Jesus in the middle laying down on an alter, and on the sides are spectators. I'm calling all the people next to me to see the portrait. I say look it's Jesus! But no dare to look, everyone is minding their own business. So I just look more intensely upon Jesus. He is tied up on the alter, like Isaac being bound ready to be killed and sacrificed. I saw Him like a sheep to be slaughter, his face is like of a lamb.
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There are so many other details, this is only a short version.

I feel like being in a prison, every day the prison is getting smaller and smaller. It's like my flesh is being ripped from my body little by little. I prayed I want Melchezdek so badly, didn't know the price that comes with it. But the present suffering is working in me an eternal weighed of Glory. Considering this the present suffering is no comparison to the coming glory that will be revealed to us. So if I die, I die. So be it. For tomorrow, it'll be all worth it.

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